10 Films All Hypochondriacs Should Avoid

8. Contagion - A Common Cold Will Never Be The Same

It might look like it's going to be a big motion picture due to the star-studded cast (Matt Damon, Jude Law, and Bryan Cranston, but to name a few) but actually, Contagion isn't so much of an action packed epidemic movie as it is a gentle decline into the imminent death of the human race - until a cure is created, of course. Which it is usually is in these films. But don't be misled into thinking there's a happy ending. Half the cast die from common cold-like symptoms, including a rather moody Kate Winslet (although her mood is probably understandable under the circumstances) and Gwyneth Paltrow, who might be the one you'd point the finger at for spreading the virus in the first place. In short, the disease - called the MEV-1 virus - spreads from bats to bananas to pigs to humans. And gives basically all of them a cold which kills them. Hand sanitiser won't save you this time, so it's probably worth giving Contagion a miss altogether.
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I love Stephen King and music festivals; I eat my toast upside down; I daydream about getting married probably a bit too much; and I wish every day for a pet sausage dog puppy (who never materialises – sob).