If Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory was one of the first family movies to deliberately invoke a slim thread of a more adult sensibility to rope parents into the fun, then The Princess Bride takes that thread, weaves it into a Holocaust Cloak and sets the damn thing on fire. Just as the films tagline tells you (Heroes. Giants. Villains. Wizards. True Love. Not just your basic, average, everyday, ordinary, run-of-the-mill, ho-hum fairy tale), this film packs everything into a relatively slimline, razor-sharp ninety-eight minute running time. That marketing spiel, of course, doesnt have space to include pirates, torture, the most lethal poison in the world, revenge, or the greatest swordfight in cinema history. It doesnt take in the Cliffs Of Insanity or the Fire Swamps, doesnt detail the R.O.U.S.es (Rodents Of Unusual Size) or the Screaming Eels that haunt the waters of Florin. It misses out the miracle man, the Brute Squad, the six-fingered man, and To The Pain. It leaves out the part where Andre The Giant is beaten by a skinny English dude with a sleeper hold, and where the framing story is read to Kevin out of The Wonder Years by freakin Colombo. It also fails to take into account the fact that the plot hinges around a failed effort at warmongering and profiteering between two countries named after obsolete currencies - Guilder and Florin - that were traditionally considered interchangeable. Thats adult satire so obscure that it verges on the arcane. How marvellous.
Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.
