10 Movies That Were Never Meant To Be Good
Who knew a sequel to a video game movie would suck?
There’s an old Hollywood maxim which states that there are three types of movies: those that aspire to quality and succeed, those that aspire to quality and fail and those that were never meant to be any good at all.
According to William Goldman, the latter category is made up of sequels, spin offs and remakes – nearly every movie playing at a multiplex near you, in other words. Because the pulse to make them is financial rather than creative they can never be the same quality as the original, and because they’re made for a specific audience they often seem soulless and mechanical.
One of the big advantages to living in an era where everything is about now is that audiences afraid of missing something forget disappointments quickly. These movies promised the moon and fell short, they were the Next Big Thing that might have been, the spectacles that weren’t very spectacular. They short changed audiences – but after a week, who cares?
Some movies just plain play audiences for suckers, and shame on you if you paid to see any of them...
10. Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising
Neighbors was one of the biggest surprises of 2014, making $270 million worldwide on a budget $18 million, so here’s the gratuitous sequel and – surprise! – it’s not of the same quality.
Part I featured Seth Rogen and Rose Byrne falling afoul of a fraternity headed by Zac Efron, so this time the same characters fall afoul of a sorority headed by Chloe Grace Moretz, and the jokes are pretty much what you’d expect from an R-rated comedy.
If nothing else, the movie answers such important questions as, “What happens if you turn a garden hose on bikini-clad sorority sisters?” and “What does Seth Rogen look like with fake abs drawn on his stomach?”
For confirmation that you’re getting a movie that’s a step down from its predecessor, just check out the soundtrack, which trades down from David Bowie to Kenny Loggins.