9. Flash Gordon (1980)
Here's a question you can ask about most of the movies on this list: How the !&^* did this get made? For the rest of the movies on this list, that's a question full of surprise and gratitude. For Flash Gordon, that's a legitimate question of utter bafflement. The fact that Flash Gordon can fit so many bad ideas into a 111-minute runtime is almost an achievement unto itself. Flash Gordon isn't the only slice of cheese on this list, but here's what separates it from the rest: I'm not sure that the filmmakers were in on the joke. Flash Gordon looks like a 70's disco threw up on Star Wars. According to the DVD commentary, Sam J. Jones (Flash Gordon) was actually doubled by a six-foot tall block of wood in several key scenes and no one on set noticed. It features Timothy Dalton at his most serious standing next to Brain Blessed (with wings) at his most Brain Blessed (with wings). It even features that Swede who played chess with Death as Ming The Merciless, giving one last attempt to pull the 1930's stereotype of the "yellow menace" out of obscurity. It should be viewed as a disaster among disasters, a film that not even Sam J. Jones' mother or Joel Schumacher could love. Except, it has one secret weapon... Queen. It's impossible to hate a movie where Brain May rocks out and Freddie Mercury sings "Flash!!! AAAEEEAAAHHH!!!" every five minutes. If you can get behind some Freddie Mercury, then there's a good chance you're willing to embrace Flash Gordon's gaudy charms. In its own weird way, it really is a visually stunning movie. This version of Flash Gordon (and there will be others...) delivers some simple pulp thrills, a surprising amount of kink for kiddie fare, and all manner of unintentionally hilarious moments that only get funnier on repeat viewings. Hate to say it - but it's a helluva lot of fun. After all... "Flash!!! AAAEEEAAAHHH!!!