7. Batman & Robin (1997)
Joel Schumacher's second Batman movie is practically supercharged with cliches. There is the narrow-minded mentor vs. the hot-headed learner dynamic between Batman and Robin. This is combined with a love triangle between the two involving Poison Ivy, who is played by the movie's saving grace, Uma Thurman. It is Arnold Schwarzenegger's Mr. Freeze that, for all the wrong reasons, provides the films best laughs as a perpetual one-liner machine including, "Hey, Batman. What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!" The biggest shame of this movie is that it's best actor, Uma Thurman, was given so little to work with aside from puns worse than Schwarzenegger's and a cliched, single-note back story that takes its cues from Selina Kyle in Tim Burton's Batman Returns: A lowly assistant who learns too much regarding her boss' psychotic plans to expand his wealth and therefore must die. The boss never quite sees the deed through, resulting in an unfulfilling attempted murder that provides our villain with new-found powers. Freeze's backstory is not any more original as it includes the typical troubled past and another science experiment gone wrong. He has since moved from a profession in the sciences to one as a jewel thief. The plot shifts to explain it is diamonds that provide his suit with the energy to keep him cold. This theoretically links to his motivation of stealing enough diamonds to create a super-freeze ray and cover the whole world in ice. If it doesn't make sense, don't worry: It's all explained vaguely enough to keep you from caring too much. Just chalk it up to many of his elaborate death traps, of which he provides more than his share. Because if writers ever had the villain just kill the hero when he has the chance, movies would be over before they start. The film also tries to incorporate Bane, but falls victim to the "too many villains" cliche. Perhaps most frustrating for fans of the original comics, the writers have swapped out Bane's well-known intelligence and fit the character into the "Dumb Meathead" mold to provide a thoughtless henchman for Poison Ivy. As always, Batman movie veteran Michael Gough brings his reliable best to the role of Alfred as he fulfills another movie cliche: The Old Man On His Death Bed. Unfortunately, these rare human moments are buried under studio pressures to make the film more "Toyetic."