1. For Sale: My Marriage
One More Day is the story-line widely regarded as the power-fantasy of then Marvel Editor in Chief Joe Quesada, who publicly lauded the fact that Spider-Man was made to settle down, believing that it aged the character too much. The notorious story is set after the events of Civil War, in which Peter, desperate to save his Aunt May from the wounds of a sniper bullet with his name on it, goes about trying to have her healed. Parker turns to Dr. Strange, who states that he cannot help May for some reason, but he can give Parker a magical doohickey that will take him to each of the people who potentially can. They all say no, including a mutant whose power is healing people. Obviously, they all have decided that a woman who has been in her sixties since the sixties needs to die a natural death, even if a natural death means a gut-shot wound from an assassin. Readers held their breath in anticipation of Aunt May finally being killed off and a new chapter of Peters life beginning, myself included. No, this is not me being ageist or condoning the death of an innocent woman but Peter still living with his Aunt at his age reminds me of my own life and how depressing it is. Out of his depth and with no options left, Peter did what any fraught person would do; he turned to God. God is the one who wears a lot of red, right? Spidey is approached by Mephisto, the Devil of the Marvel Universe, and is offered his assistance. In exchange for saving Aunt May, Mephisto simply tells both Peter and a pregnant MJ that he wants their marriage and, by extension, her fetus. It is on this dark day that Spider-Man trades his marriage to a redheaded supermodel for the life of his Aunt, who stars in her own version of Final Destination every time she steps outside when there is a cold breeze. The moral of this story? Its cheaper to strike a deal with Satan than it is to get a divorce. Nobody needs all that paperwork. Are there any other times where Spider-Man was a Spider-Douche? Share any more down below.