Having never made a worthwhile film in the sum of his twenty year career, it's not exactly surprising that Paul W.S. Anderson's volcano-based blockbuster is as inessential as pretty much everything else in his filmography. So here's a movie pitched and built around the conceit that Mount Vesuvius erupted once, and there has to be a story we can tell there somewhere, right? Wrong. Anderson's flick is clunky and mostly uninspired, an amalgamation of other equally terrible movies built in the "historical fantasy" vein Hollywood is currently so taken with. The plot is barely that. A former slave turned gladiator, played by Kit Harington to bland effect, must rescue actress Emily Browning before she's swamped with lava, but has to battle his way out of an arena setting first, because we need something to happen whilst Pompeii crumbles, don't we? Many critics have cited Pompeii as a guilty pleasure - undoubtably naff, but watchable nonetheless. To their credit, there are points where this might all be considered dumb fun, but never for long enough that it allows you to forget that fact that you're watching utter tripe.
Sam Hill is an ardent cinephile and has been writing about film professionally since 2008. He harbours a particular fondness for western and sci-fi movies.
