It's a testament to how much America truly and deeply loves Bruce Willis that despite his misguided appearance in North, his career is still largely intact. The film was an early 90s mistake, starring a young Elijah Wood as a preteen who, upon deciding that his parents aren't good enough, sets out on a cross-country journey to find a mom and dad who will do the job properly. And as hopelessly endearing as that sounds on paper, it's actually one of the worst movies ever made. Bruce Willis, for his part, plays a wise, kindly adviser to the young boy, presumably because Morgan Freeman was out of town at the time. When writing a review of North, the late great Roger Ebert didn't mince words. Of the 1994 film, he said, "North is one of the most unpleasant, contrived, artificial, cloying experiences I've had at the movies. To call it manipulative would be inaccurate; it has an ambition to manipulate, but fails." A few paragraphs later, he goes on to clarify his position, as though worried that his readers are confused about his feelings on this movie. "I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it."
Audrey Fox is an ex-film student, which means that she prefers to spend her days in the dark, watching movies and pondering the director's use of diegetic sound. She currently works as an entertainment writer, joyfully rambling about all things film and television related. Add her on Twitter at @audonamission and check out her film blog at 1001moviesandbeyond.com.
