9. People On Their Phones
In amongst all these adverts, we get some equally patronising message telling us to turn off our mobile phones. It seems like such a simple task: you're in a public space where other people are trying to watch something important, so turn it off and show some respect. But no sooner have the lights gone down, than the darkness is lit up by lots of little lights, with people tweeting, Facebooking, texting and even taking calls during the film. It's absolutely maddening.
8. People Talking
Even if they're not on their phones, chances are there'll be some people who choose to talk all the way through a film. Laughing at a joke is fine and good, but we don't care for your opinions on whether said actress is hot or whether the plot is stupid. You are not the centre of the universe, nor are you the fountain of all knowledge and wit. Those conversations (if you can call them that) can wait for the post-film discussion in the bar - or at home, if you're not old enough to drink.
7. Loud Eaters & Drinkers
Having food and drink in the cinema is one thing, but there's a right way and a wrong way to go about consuming it. If you really must eat nachos, please have the common courtesy not to crunch loudly in someone's ear, let alone dribble sauce on their lap while they're trying to concentrate. Likewise, don't spend 10 minutes trying to open a bag of food if you have to endlessly rustle it to get anything out - let alone ask somebody to do it for you. Finally, you don't really need that last little bit of coke at the bottom of your massive cup. It will still be there when the film's over: the audience's patience won't.