A British version of SEVEN SAMURAI is a footballing epic titled THE MAGNIFICENT ELEVEN!!!

by Matt Holmes

Akira Kurosawa's legendary Japanese classic The Seven Samurai birthed the blueprint of Hollywood's most loved ensemble Western - The Magnificent Seven, the same basic story told in a different genre, language and setting. Now we Brits never did have a Western outlaw period to match our American counterparts but we do have the beautiful game, and our version of the Seven Samurai is a war played on the grass. Oh, and Tandoori restaurants!! Screen Daily say that When Saturday Comes actor Sean Bean is to topline The Magnificent Eleven, a contemporary comedic remake of The Magnificent Seven (and Kurosawa's pic by definition) that is to be directed by Trainspotting author Irvine Welsh as his feature directorial debut. The movie centers on a group of struggling amateur league footballers where...

...the Cowboys are a local amateur soccer team, the Indians run a nearby Tandoori restaurant and the bandits are a group of menacing thugs run by a maniac called Blonde Bob.
Scotsman Dougray Scott is also set to make up part of the 11, and veteran Robert Vaughn has been transferred as the last surviving primary cast member of The Magnificent Seven over the Atlantic for this movie but at 77 he's obviously too old for a kick about. A role in the dug-out for him, perhaps?A poster at distributor Angry Beaver Films also list Fully Monty & Only Fools and Horses' (he played Denzel) Paul Barber listed as part of the cast, along with the tagline "11 United can never be defeated". Screenplay is birthed from brothers Pete and John Adams, and later Welsh himself when he eventually joined the writing team last year. A financial package is currently being sought in Berlin but a comedy about the nation's favourite sport with a likeable cast, could catch a Full Monty wave - and become a goldmine for the U.K. film industry. Other actors who are bound to end up in this include Michael Sheen (the wizardry footballer who played Brian Clough in The Damned United), Vinnie Jones, Stephen Graham, Robert Carlyle and Danny Dyer. Anyone who was ever on the Sky t.v. show Dream Team could probably be named a contender also. Pete Postlethwaite to play the manager?

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Editor-in-chief

Matt Holmes is the co-founder of What Culture, formerly known as Obsessed With Film. He has been blogging about pop culture and entertainment since 2006 and has written over 10,000 articles.