Gremlins Reboot: 10 Reasons We'd Rather Stare At Bright Lights

Gizmo Angry Why on Earth would you remake Gremlins? I don't care about the fact that I've just skipped the traditional opening and jumped straight into the interrogation phase, I'm that mad. As a kid, Gremlins was an iconic classic, and I was always reminded by my parents of this fact. I had a Gizmo plush, a VHS copy of the film, and even a nickname my father gave me that was related to the film. Personal connection to the film firmly intact, I feel as if I must defend it against Hollywood's greedy mitts. Sure, BT had that advert not too long ago that brought back the Gremlins in a professional IT setting; but that's just an advert, not a full film. People expect plot and excitement, and especially dialogue, from a film; all, except excitement, were absent for the ad. So now it has come to this, me once more trying to talk Hollywood off the ledge. Well fine. You want me to convince you why Hollywood shouldn't be making another Gremlins and why you shouldn't be excited about this? Done. Though, Hollywood being as stubborn as they are, they're probably going to ignore the pleas of reason and go ahead anyway. If they really want something, they'll go for it, which explains why they're still trying to sell the world on the idea that Ashton Kutcher is an Actor. So with that in mind, I will also be suggesting some hints and tips as to how Hollywood could possibly make a good movie out of a bad situation. Without further delay, dim the lights, hide your water, and check your clocks...it's time to let everyone's favorite Mogwai out once more.
Contributor
Contributor

Mike Reyes may or may not be a Time Lord, but he's definitely the Doctor Who editor here at What Culture. In addition to his work at What Culture, Mr. Reyes writes for Cocktails and Movies, as well as his own personal blogs Mr. Controversy and The Bookish Kind. On top of that, he's also got a couple Short Stories and Novels in various states of completion, like any good writer worth their salt. He resides in New Jersey, and compiles his work from all publications on his Facebook page.