Gremlins Reboot: 10 Reasons We'd Rather Stare At Bright Lights

8. There's No Good Choice To Play Billy Peltzer

BillyProblem: Billy Peltzer: bank clerk by day, comic geek/artist by night. With his sweet, yet emo, girlfriend Kate; Billy leads a quiet life in the idyllic Kingston Falls. At least, until the Gremlins roll into town, at which time he morphs into a Ripley-esque hero forged by trauma. (Seriously, look at those curls!) Billy is such a unique character that walks a thin line that is a total nerd with a steady, beautiful girlfriend. Admit it, if this was any other film, Kate would have entertained the idea of going to Gerald's apartment, only to leave awkwardly after he tried to kiss her and realize that Billy was best. Here, we're treated to the rare (at least by 80's standards) couple that doesn't stereotypically split apart due to her boyfriend's almost man-child like life. If They HAVE To...: Make it a film about someone else. If you have a new Billy Peltzer you're going to open yourself up to the comparisons remakes usually do. The best options you have for a Billy Peltzer is Paul Rudd and/or Matthew Perry about 10 years ago, and that ship has sailed. The only modern actor that might, MIGHT be able to lock in on the sweet yet snarky tone of Billy's geekiness (and later his transformation into horror film hero) is either Andy Samberg or Joseph Gordon Levitt. Even money goes to JGL if Spielberg remains involved, but even then it'd be better to give him his own character to work with. (Also, whatever you do, DON'T cast Zooey Deschanel as Kate. I know it's tempting, but her twee nature is past its shelf life. Let her fade out on The New Girl like she's chosen to do.)
Contributor
Contributor

Mike Reyes may or may not be a Time Lord, but he's definitely the Doctor Who editor here at What Culture. In addition to his work at What Culture, Mr. Reyes writes for Cocktails and Movies, as well as his own personal blogs Mr. Controversy and The Bookish Kind. On top of that, he's also got a couple Short Stories and Novels in various states of completion, like any good writer worth their salt. He resides in New Jersey, and compiles his work from all publications on his Facebook page.