Jurassic Park 4: 10 Ways To Make It A Success

3. No Children

A controversial idea, maybe, but how many times do children need to be put in danger before people realise that Jurassic Park is dangerous enough for adults, let alone kids? The only way kids should be involved is if Jurassic Park is open for business and finally safe and secure. Don't send them there to test out the facilities, don't have them stowaway on the journey there only to emerge on arrival, and don't have them surviving on their own there for 8 weeks in the wild. Kids, for me, have spoiled the previous movies by making them (even more) unrealistic. No kid should be able to hack their way in to a sophisticated security system, no kid should be able to use their high school gymnastic moves to kill a Velociraptor, and no kid should be able to survive alone on an island otherwise inhabited by only dinosaurs for 8 whole weeks. Having another kid enduring the carnage of escaped dinosaurs would be as irresponsible as the McCallister family abandoning Kevin for a third time in the Home Alone series (two was enough, thanks). It's implausible and simply shouldn't happen.