3. Jason 'Woods' Valley - Scorched (2003)
The vast majority of people reading this will not have seen Scorched and that's not entirely surprising, since almost no-one saw it when it was first released ten years ago. Directed by Gavin Grazer (brother of Oscar-winning producer Brian), Scorched is a caper comedy in which three tellers at the same bank form separate plans to rob the main vault - but all pick the same day to do the job. In carrying out their plans they fall foul of local millionaire Charles Merchant (John Cleese) and his fearsome Pomeranian dog a phrase I never thought I'd have to write. Scorched is a classic example of a neat little premise spoiled by shoddy execution in this case, inept writing, unfocussed direction and a host of unfunny, unnecessary supporting characters. While Alicia Silverstone's performance is as wooden as her turn in Batman and Robin, Harrelson fares just as badly as the nature-loving Jason 'Valley' Woods. His character has no depth, his motivation makes little sense, and his performances consists almost entirely of gurning and screaming. And being stupid.