2. Train - "Hey Soul Sister"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVpv8-5XWOI One could argue that Train has been making music devoid of any real personality for quite some time. But now they've gotten to the point where they're making music devoid of any decipherable meaning, as well. If you've ever watched a Train music video or have seen a picture of lead singer Pat Monahan, you could probably guess that he's the type of d-bag who would decide to write a song about the Burning Man festival because "I guess it's a total crazy deal." Yeah, that's right, he wrote "Hey Soul Sister" about what he
thought Burning Man would be like, even though he's never experienced it in any form. That explains why there are lines like "Your lipstick stains on the front lobe of my left side brain," which are words that sound exactly like a lame dude from the suburbs trying to sound "deep" or "spiritual." The rest of the lyrics are just as bad, particularly the bridge, which appears to be the result of an uncool dad having his brain hemorrhage recorded over a ukulele:
The way you can cut a rugWatching you's the only drug I needSo gangster, I'm so thugYou're the only one I'm dreaming ofYou see I can be myself now finallyIn fact there's nothing I can't beI want the world to see you'll be with me
What does any of that mean? It means you shouldn't write a song about a subject you know absolutely nothing about!