10 Reasons Greek Mythology Is Messed Up

Unfortunately, things didn’t work out in the family from the very beginning.

The firstlings of mother and son were the Cyclops, who behaved like pre-classical teenagers and rebelled against their father-brother. In those days sending problematic brood to Tartarus was going to be the equivalent of dispatching youngsters to their rooms… for about an eternity. So Uranus established the antecedent of grounding by dumping his unruly one-eyed descendants-sibs into the underworld.

The second-born bunch was the Titans. When Gaia found out what her husband did, she disapproved, literally turning her youngest Titan son, Cronus, against his father. She endowed him with a sickle so he could castrate Uranus at the earliest opportunity. We'll spare the details, but this arguably hasty decision took place.

Then, the story branches out unexpectedly: when Cronus got rid of his progenitor’s genitals, they fell into the ocean and splashed foam and blood which brought forth Aphrodite, the goddess of love and beauty. She now seems less attractive now, doesn't she?