Some or all of your bike will be stolen. It will. Say it with me now: "Some or all of my bike will be stolen. I have chosen to live in London and I have chosen to have a bike and this is therefore a fact of my life. All property is theft anyway, including- nay, particularly- my bike. The universe is expanding every second and we are all stardust, including the person who will steal some or all of my bike. They are stardust and I will not wish them ill...except when I am trapped on a crowded tube on a Monday morning, surrounding by other stinking stardust, having just spent the last of my wages on my Oyster. Then I will wish them a little ill".
Brydie is an Australian writer and performer living in London and she complains exactly the same amount about the weather as every other Australian living in London. Yes, that is her natural lip colour, no, she will not be taking any further questions at this time.
