14 Thoughts You Have When Your Best Friend Announces Their Engagement

14. You're Jealous That They Can Get Fat Now

Being single is like working in sales because you are literally selling your benefits to potential suitors. You have to dazzle them with your charm and wit whilst enticing them with your knockout body. You wear clothes that compliment you, because no one feels sexy in baggy jumpers and leggings that have no shape, and no matter what anyone says, looks definitely play a big part of things in the early stages of the dating game. But your friend has just announced her engagement and all you can think about how unfair it is that she can now let herself go. She could eat chocolate all day, gain 20 pounds and STILL have someone want to wake up with her every morning. Obviously this will all happen after the wedding, because no one wants to feel ugly on their wedding day.