15 Problems Only People Who Hate Christmas Will Understand

5. Mall Santa Line-Ups

You don't want to see him anyway. He didn't get you what you wanted all those years ago. Your kids, however, do. And lets be honest: the picture of a smiling child sitting on Santa's knee is a priceless family heirloom. Of course, what usually happens is that the line-up takes so long, the kid is squirming by the time you get there. And he's only smiling if you're lucky - there's a good chance your Santa photo ends with your child crying, a look of terror in his eyes due to the strange, large bearded man whose lap you dropped him in minutes before. Next time, just photoshop the little brat in with a picture of Saint Nick. No one can tell the difference these days, even if they have seen a few pixels in their time.