The world revolves around this person (the name is the Princess, but it could just as easily be a guy). They don't understand why you can't make an exception for them in regards to store policy after all, they're just one teeny tiny person, where's the harm in that? You try to explain that it's not that simple, your boss checks on those things, or the computer system literally won't let you do what they're asking for, or that if you do it for them, you have to do it for everyone. It doesn't work.
5. The One With The Throbbing Vein In His Forehead
This man is irate. Something horrible has gone wrong, and you hope to God it wasn't your fault. Unfortunately, he's usually very perturbed about something that is completely out of your control. "What?? You mean I only have 30 days to return this?? And I need a receipt?! You don't understand, I am a very important customer! I want to speak to your manager!" This probably isn't a good time to tell him that you are the manager.
4. The Coupon Ninja
On the one hand, you have to appreciate the time and effort that went into their voracious couponing. They've got every offer your store has ever made, including the online codes pulled up and ready to go on their phone. The only problem? Entering in all these codes and scanning the coupons and checking to make sure they're all still valid takes time. Woe betide you if you work at a store that makes you manually enter in the discount. The Coupon Ninja may have saved a bundle, but the twelve people in line behind her are less enthused.
3. Complicated Question Karen
Karen has a knack for asking the type of questions that probably weren't even covered in your policy manual, and definitely not in your training sessions. She's a lawyer in her non-shopping life, and she's not above trying to exploit the loopholes in your store's corporate policy. Inevitably, her questions will have to go up the chain of command, first to your disgruntled manager, who will spend the better part of his or her afternoon on hold with the corporate office to seek clarification. Karen is content to wait.
2. The Pack Of Teenagers
Don't they have anywhere else to go? They spend a few hours milling about, making you have to keep a steady eye on them to make sure they're not shoplifting. Their constant giggling makes you feel like you're back in high school, and you can't help but think that they're laughing at you. The bottom line is, if you're going to spend two hours in a store, you should at least buy something. Restaurants don't put up with those kind of shenanigans.
1. The One Who Cuts You Off When You Greet Them
There is a special circle in hell reserved for this people. You start to say, "Hi, can I --", but before you can get it all the way out, they wave you off dismissively, saying, "Just looking." As if they don't realize (which they probably don't), that you could get in trouble for not greeting customers in the proper way. You don't like it any more than they do. They should have the decency to let you get through your spiel so that you can both get on with your lives.
Audrey Fox is an ex-film student, which means that she prefers to spend her days in the dark, watching movies and pondering the director's use of diegetic sound. She currently works as an entertainment writer, joyfully rambling about all things film and television related. Add her on Twitter at @audonamission and check out her film blog at 1001moviesandbeyond.com.
