12. Stop Complaining About Public Transport
Channel FourSecond only to the weather in the roster of Great British Topics, you can bank on public transport coming up in conversations which last a particular amount of time. The reason is supposedly that we need at least one topic to complain about per day, and given that buses and their ilk are the most common source of chagrin for Brits of all ages (affecting schoolchildren, commuters, and the elder generation alike), they have automatically been bumped up to become national whipping boys. In a perfect world, we'd all be able to move to Japan and forget about irregular train services for good. Alas, it seems that first-world problems are just too much fun to complain about. Whether arriving late for work or arriving home to our families after a stressful day, it's always worth bitching about how your status as a societal lynchpin is being mocked by inferior transport schedules and overlong cigarette breaks on the part of the drivers. And on this note, we're also totally unable to...
11. Run For The Bus Without Looking Distressingly Graceless
NBCThis isn't exactly exclusive to Britons, but given that: a) bus services are unpredictable at best, and b) we like to burden ourselves with ungainly accessories, such as umbrellas, suitcases, and questionable footwear, it's especially tough for Brits to withstand the horrendous social suicide that is attempting to reach the bus-stop before our desired vehicle pulls away. Since running only attracts unwanted attention from strangers, we usually begin by half-heartedly shuffling along the pavement a little faster than is normal, and when we reach a certain threshold where we get tantalisingly close to our quarry, we may well break out into a frantic sprint to cover the final few metres to the bus-stop. It's embarrassing enough to have to demonstrate how terribly unfit we are as we breathlessly arrive amid our fellow commuters, but what's much worse is when we end up missing the bus in spite of our flat-footed charging. Nonchalance is pretty damn hard to fake when you're coated in sweat and stifling the very British urge to gasp swear-words under your breath.