Dear banker: I don't care how much you've already spent here or that you think it's "not fair" or that you only want "one f***ing beer". I don't make the rules but I do get in trouble if I break them, buddy. Add some scratchings to your order and let's all move on with our lives. And no, we're still not set up for contactless but do feel free to ask me that exact question every time you come to the bar and then sigh loudly when I say no.
Brydie is an Australian writer and performer living in London and she complains exactly the same amount about the weather as every other Australian living in London. Yes, that is her natural lip colour, no, she will not be taking any further questions at this time.
