Damn you lucky sleeping people, with your hopes and your dreams and your comfort. While everyone else is playing with guns or can fly or is an action hero in their own made-up movie, you're stuck in reality, faced starkly with your own inability to do the same. You'll probably get really annoyed with those people as a result. "Damn sleepers. Go back to sleep. You don't deserve to be awake. Yeah go on, close your eyes. Don't talk to people like us. Stick to your own kind" etc.
11. Eyes Gluing Shut After They're Closed For Too Long
After about 45 minutes of having your eyes closed, for some reason the human body insists on secreting a cement-like substance that glues them shut. There's probably a scientific name for this.
10. Dry Mouth
Is it an Australian desert? Is it Jack Dee's approach to stand up comedy? Is it a hobnob in a ditch? No, it's your mouth when you can't sleep; a state of which will cause a lot of trips back and forth from the nearest tap. Each trip will seem longer than the last, morphing from small excursions to full-on epic pilgrimages. They'll all have the same destination; the elixir of a simple cup or glass of water, that disappears into your mouth as fast as it materializes. Thus starts an endless loop of drinking and drinking and drinking, until eventually...
