22 Problems Only Call Centre Workers Will Understand

You have to go there to come back, and if you've been here, you'll want to rant about it.

Anyone who works, or has worked in a call centre will know there's no other psychological trauma quite like it; hooked up to a phone that never stops for the majority of your life, subjected to the worst kinds of humanity, and being on the receiving end of all negative repercussions from decisions made by untouchable figures at the top of the food chain. Any fudge ups, you're in the firing line. Time is everything: military clocking-in, monitored toilet breaks, strict call-length control... welcome to the world of the robot. Never has the nail been hit quite so precisely on the metaphorical head as when a Contact Centre Manager described them as 'satanic mills' to the BBC a few years back - for that they are. Still, it can be a giggle. In darkness, there is light. In misery, there is comfort: millions of other call-centre workers around the world know your pain. For we were all once sympathetic souls, until we started working in a call centre. Here's 22 trials and tribulations we've all experienced in the land of the call centre. For the lucky among you who escaped; the bittersweet memories will come flooding back reading this. Feel free to share your own experiences in the comments below.

22. Spending A Little Longer Than Necessary Listening To Another Departments Hold Music

Never before has Classic FM been so seductively enchanting. Unless you're unfortunate enough to have that call picked up in your weekly monitoring, no one is going to know you've spent an added 40 seconds enjoying M People's "Search For A Hero". Just look busy.

21. When Your Manager Announces An Early Finish

"But only two of you can go." Oh, this is awkward. Especially when the entire team want to do a Tasmanian Devil whirlwind out of the place right that second. It's a battle of morals and selfishness as you weigh it out with the others. Some have children to pick up from school; you just want to be released from Hell.

20. 'The Systems Are All Back Up And Running Now'

funnyjunk.comfunnyjunk.comCould you just, not? We were all thoroughly enjoying that wonderfully unheralded tea break whilst the systems went down. Now its back to a queue of further-disgruntled customers because they couldn't get through before. Yippee.
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Human woman. Content Manager at What Culture. Lover of many "ologies", punk rock and cats. My god is Il├║vatar. Follow me on Twitter: @nina_cresswell