25 Problems Only People From Morpeth Will Understand

11. Joining 'Morpeth Matters' On Facebook & Instantly Regretting It

Ever seen the movie Hot Fuzz? Morpeth has its own N.W.A... An N.W.A with a Facebook page. "For the greater good." Morpeth Matters is a place that the residents of Morpeth go to air their frustrations about the happenings in the town, ask for advice on a new barber or cobbler, or troll the existing members so much that lifetime bans are handed out by the dozen. Campaign movements for a McDonalds never to be opened in Morpeth and other issues that can only be described as utter tosh dominate the agenda. To put it bluntly, it's a place that people with nothing better to do with their time go to b*tch and whine, airing their horribly narrow minded views to sooth their exaggerated egos. You'll realise within a few hours of joining the 'cult' that it was a mistake. You are bombarded with an amount of Facebook notifications that threaten to send your mobile device into cardiac arrest. No one likes that... There's even a conspiracy theory regarding a "fake MM" group going on at the moment. My goodness, how terribly exciting...