8 Science Facts They Probably Didn't Teach You In School

6. Dolphins Are Just The Worst

Dolphins are living proof of the power of good PR. Despite their cutesy reputation, they are more like sex-crazed sea demons than happy little water puppies.

Some of the most common diseases dolphins get are STIs and that's no surprise, seeing as they will screw pretty much anything that moves. Males dolphins have been known to penetrate each others blowholes with their prehensile penises, whereas female bottlenose dolphins have been known to use those noses for more creative purposes (dlidos, guys. Dolphin dildos).

When there isn't a random dolphin orifice within reach, dolphins will Macgyver a mastabatory aid from somewhere. They have been known to use live eels to get themselves off, and here's a video of one using the body of a dead fish, just in case you hadn't had enough weird internet for the day.