The Snarkiest True Blood Season 6 Recap - Episode 1
Castle Compton looks slightly more sinister than usual. Sookie has the basic sense to go inside armed, although it occurs to no one not to follow the trail of bloody footprints. Recapper: Hes never gonna get that out of the wood grain. Theres a big pile of bloody dust on the floor in Bills room. Recapper: Lets imagine Bill shaking blood off like a dog, just for a moment. Sookie goes first out onto the porch to confront the evil God, because Sookie is really dumb. She yells at Bill, then Eric and Nora attack Bill and get their asses kicked. Recapper: He just wanted to talk! He didnt even come close to killing anyone. You guys are all bullies. Also, you apparently dont get the whole god concept. Sookie stakes Bill, which I guess is a big deal. Based on Bill's expression, the stake also clearly stings a bit. Bill scolds everyone and explains that hes not going to hurt anyone unless they hurt him first. Also that hes sorry he scared everyone. He also creeps on Sookie. Recapper: No! Bill! Youve been doing so well! Cold turkey on the Sookie! Sookie is mean to Bill, then Jessica throws in with Bill, who looks rather grateful. Fangs come out, Jessica yells at Sookie, Bill back Jessica up with a freaking earthquake, and everyone walks quickly to the front door.