That tricky motherf**ker! Tis the season of amazing one liners and we were treated to some of the best in the latest episode of True Blood. That particular little gift was thrust upon us by Jason in an attempt to keep up the pretence of him actually caring that Eric had escaped, true LAVTF soldier style. Of course, Jason doesn't care and his little charade seems to be working in his favour so far, he managed to get close to Jessica and help her to oh wait she has the hots for someone else never mind. Unlucky Jason, it seems you dont always get the girl but we cant fault you for putting together your
flawless plan to break Jessica out of Vamp Camp. You know who doesn't have the hots for Jessica right now, me. She is spiralling out of control through her guilt of draining Bellefleur daughters B,C and D but look on the bright side Jessica, Faerie A survived and is possibly in for a whole lot of loving from one (or both if recent shenanigans are anything to go by) of Hollys sons so its not all bad. So Jessica is in self-destruct mode and decides to skip over the fact that Jason has hatched such a brave and elaborate plan to ensure her freedom, and proceeds to order herself a little treat in the form of Vampire Saint, James. It seems she is a big believer in checking off the bucket list and one of those things on the list is swimming with dolphins? NO. Travelling the world? Wrong again! Having vampire sex? Correct. How could Saint James turn down the wishes of such an innocent vampire when they are moments away from death, that would not be very noble or saintly of him now would it. I like to play a game of
you know you are watching True Blood when and in this episode that sentence ended with
when you are shouting at the television dont kiss the severed head, DONT kiss the severed head! Yes Im talking to you Sarah Newlin. Bon Temps best dressed wondered into the governors compound to find him in two separate pieces and proceeded to express her grief by kissing the severed head and affirming that God is good in a Romeo and Juliet, your death will not be in vain kind of moment. Sarah Newlin has been many things throughout the series, doting wife, co-founder of Fellowship of the Sun, scorned lover and following the tragic loss of her man shes now gone all Kerry Washington in Scandal on us. Apparently Im not the only one obsessed with ABCs Scandal as the writers have taken a huge leaf from the Scandal play book with Sarahs cover up plan to keep the governors death under wraps while she continues to execute his evil plan and no one will be the wiser. OK, so Kerry Washingtons character Olivia Pope does not take decapitated bodies and destroy them with acid and she can keep a secret for more than 30seconds unlike Sarah Newlin, BUT the similarities are there, this is a very True Blood style Scandal fix. Sam Merlotte wasnt gone for long which is(N'T) a shocking twist, I hope he stays as long as he drops his new squeeze, he has been a great character from the beginning. You have got to love the extremely vast contrast of running around trying to create a freedom movement, to being picked up from a shabby motel by your mum. Are we 16? If you are old enough to have shower sex with a middle aged man you are old enough to find your own way home young lady! I dont think Sam needed to call upon his shifter powers to sniff out the disappointment in the air upon meeting the mother in law, it was pretty clear she was not thrilled about the situation. With everything going on I almost forgot Sooki and Warlow existed, unfortunately their sepia coloured love in was interrupted by Arlene grieving in the real world. Yes, the real world which apparently according to Sooki whilst playing her independent woman role, Warlow needs to get into. As she slips on her knee high socks and boots she enlightens him on how women can now vote and in addition to this
minor fact, can sleep with whomever they choose that was like SO last year Warlow! Sooki addresses how strange it feels to wake up with a conquest in the day light and how she yearned for that with her vampire ex, enter day walking Bill. Everyone is sad that Terry is gone and this grief leads to a gathering in Arlenes house where nearly every character congregates for the best part of the episode. Arlene lashes out at Lafayette by calling him a Voodoo queer, we know the people of Bon Temps are pretty small town minded but they seem to accept Vampires, shifters, wolves and whatever else rolls in to town so whats with the negativity towards Lafayette, not cool grieving Arlene, not cool. I would like to point out that this congregation took place in broad daylight, and Bill walking in didn't have the effect I or he would have hoped for when he rolled on up to join them. Brilliant move from the writers having Sooki reminisce on the awfulness that was not being able to wake up with Bill in daylight, cut to Bill day walking himself into oblivion. Could this be a subtle hint that perhaps Bill and Sooki will rekindle their relationship? I cant even begin to think about how happy that would make me, but in the mean time I will make do with Lafayette and another amazing one liner in reference to said day walking, I'm so f**king glad I took my beta-blockers, DEUCES. Couldn't have said it better myself La La. Although are we are not feeling too sad about Noras death, a look into who she is and where she came from was pretty insightful, perhaps a little late in the game but at least we now know. I think discovering the back story to each vampire and why there were made helps us like them more, Nora was always somewhat of a question mark because we didn't know her story. Her death was quite disturbing, the fact that it wasn't a quick explosion into a mass of bloody mush made it far more hard hitting and difficult to watch. She really suffered, and so did Eric. This was the first time we get to see the damage Hep- V can cause, a horrific death after a long painful suffering. Death by Hep- V is the grim fate of all vampire kind and if you are as invested in this show as I am you will hope the fire in Erics eyes in the last moment of this episode means ITS ON.