Its always interesting when ex-WWE employees shoot on the backstage meetings and decision-making process they were involved in during their time in the company. The writer of WWE Studios movie See No Evil, Dan Madigan, famously worked on Smackdown for a while as well. He tells the story of them considering various scenarios for an angle involving the Big Show, and the staff on hand spitballing ideas as to how on earth the opponent for a man so big and intimidating can possibly get over on him. What do you do to secure an advantage against a giant? One idea was poisoning: it was suggested that Shows burrito be spiked, leaving him passed out in the ring after eating it. Vince balked at this: not at the spiking angle (this is the man that greenlit Mae Young giving birth to a hand and the whole Katie Vick fiasco), but at the food item being mentioned, claiming that no one in the audience or at home would know what on earth a burrito was. There was a moment of silence, and then the rest of the room nervously spoke up, one by one confirming that they all knew what a burrito was. Vinces response?
Well, where the hell have I been?!
It was amusing enough that the firebrand who invented the World Bodybuilding Federation was so insulated from the outside world that not only did he not know what a burrito was, but that he assumed that anything he hadnt heard of would be alien to anyone else, too. That, combined with the fact that rarely ever does anyone say no to him, leaves us with a strange guy with some weird ideas and little in the way of a filter. When you think about it, this explains a lot about some of the more peculiar segments and toilet humour on WWF/E television over the years. Anyone remember a pre-taped Sunny vignette where she had sex with a a lifesize Elmo from Sesame Street? Or the Boogeyman eating Jullian Halls facial growth? Or Val Venis nearly having his Venis amputated by a katana? Or Big Bossman kidnapping Al Snows chihuahua and feeding it to him? Yeah. Lets move on. Oh, and the real reason for the writing staffs utter bafflement? Vince never let anyone break for food during these massive brainstorming sessions, but would regularly have the same food delivered to him at lunchtime by his assistant, eating it in front of his half-starved writing staff. The meal in question? A steak wrap with sauce, cut in half. You know a burrito.
Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.
