10 Architects Behind WWE's Demise

6. John Cena

Stephanie McMahon
Nickelodeon

Just watch this damn promo and defend it. You can't. It's impossible.

It's cringeworthy.

It's almost impressively unfunny.

It's so clearly written, betraying the idea that wrestling is something that happens when the light turns red.

It reduces something theoretically dramatic and scary - even awesome - into the steaming, putrid, hot cement-textured sh*t that it is. It is John Cena reducing the steel cage match, once wrestling's score-settling, blood-soaked pit of danger, into the Death Star from Star Wars. It's John Cena barely bruised from the battle he'd just endured, making a joke of it, letting you all know how meaningless all of this is, how it's all just pretext for the writers to get their horrific craic over.

It is John Cena, distilled.

Cena was the smiling face of PG WWE, a kid-friendly hero who so rarely endured anything sold as a meaningful rivalry with serious repercussions worthy of investment. Everything just reset on RAW the next night, like a live action cartoon. Nothing fazed Cena - the threat, the action, nor the consequence.

His charmless update on the Rock's cut-down promo style made so few of his matches feel big, so few of his opponents worthy.

WWE under his run was meaningless, goofy fluff, but because it was successful, it has formed the blueprint for everything to follow...

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!