10 Embarrassing Times Wrestlers Tried To Be Badass

You don't know a badass in real life because this fictional trope is inherently ludicrous. It grinds up against the forehead of parody with a grunt and does incredibly well not to fall flat on its f*cking a*se.

Steve Austin pulled it off because - and this is crucial - he recognised that. He grasped the inherent farce of being the coolest and the hardest bloke on the block and had much fun with it. He even indulged Mr. McMahon's attempts to turn him into a suit before tw*tting his boss in the balls. He showed a tiny bit of ass before kicking it, and he drank so many beers, too. So many that he nailed the heightened ideal of a badass without it being a laughable flex.

Similarly, Jon Moxley will rattle off awesome B-movie-style one-liners, but he'll also say "Aww, son of a bitch!" when he knows the spectre of a Lance Archer is looming on the horizon. He's the toughest motherf*cker in the land, but he isn't too tough.

These men had a cause, too. Austin was the man of the people. Mox is the self-styled Sheriff of AEW's heel faction-dominated gangland. That cause isn't "Make myself look tough because I'm massively, massively insecure".

The key to getting over as a badass in pro wrestling is in the effort, or the lack thereof. Any attempt to try too hard ruthlessly undermines the entire bit.

Which leads one to...

'One Final Beat' was f*cking hilarious.

It started with Johnny Gargano being dropped off for the big match by his wife, who pinched his cheek and told him to have fun.

He arrived at the empty Performance Center. It was shrouded in darkness illuminated only by ambient light. Ominous music played in the background. This was serious sh*t, man. Serious sh*t. His career rival Tommaso Ciampa entered through a different door. And there was Triple H, the architect of NXT, in the ring. But he wasn't standing in the ring. He had to look cool.

He sat on a chair on its back legs crouched in the corner, arms draped across the ropes, face fixed in a scowl. This was his David Brent moment. He legitimately thought he looked hard and authoritative, when in effect, he was sat on a chair backwards wearing a baseball cap.

"OK kids, let's rap," he said. "This is where it ends. I don't care what you guys do to each other. But when it's done here, it's done...

...until we need you to work a Fatal 4-Way Iron Man match in a desperate bid to put on a workrate classic, the answer to our troubles".

"Aight Imma bounce," he continued, making way for the melodramatic sh*t-show that followed.