10 Measures WWE Can Take To Improve AWFUL Ratings

1. The Public Roast Of Vince McMahon

Public Roast
WWE

If you've not worked it out by now, this is a facetious list, because all of your fantasy booking ideas, while not uniformly worthless, are all utterly pointless. WWE doesn't change unless Vince changes, and since Vince isn't going to change, WWE isn't going to change.

But Vince used to humiliate himself for the cause, and he often defaults to what used to work. So, in a bid to grab a rating, inspired by Conrad Thompson, WWE could present the Public Roast of Vince McMahon - a chance for the unhappy roster and fanbase alike to glean just a little bit of catharsis from all of this.

Triple H steps up, and delivers a 20-minute roast in which he gently knocks his father-in-law for NXT's higher critical value. Vince looks bemused. He does not know what this "NXT" is.

Bruce Prichard cackles and rubs his hands as he approaches the podium.

"You're doing an excellent job, sir, and all of your ideas are great."

Apollo Crews is next up. "You're meant to put smiles on peoples' faces, not mine, you mad old f*ck!"

"Have Shelton Benjamin killed," Vince says in a lowered voice.

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!