10 Things I Hate About WrestleMania

4. There€™s No Dynamic Storytelling Anymore

WWE.com
WWE.com

The Road To WrestleMania used to be a downhill plunge, and now it€™s an uphill struggle. As a general rule, the biggest show of the year used to form the basis for the biggest marquee matches and the culmination of ongoing angles, blowing off the highest profile feuds in spectacular fashion.

That€™s not the case any longer. Instead of acting as a dramatic climax, the company tends not to do anything about WrestleMania until literally a matter of a month or so before the show, then panic books the main event matches and obsesses over trying to build up decent storylines for them to the exclusion of practically everything else.

Pretty much every other match on the card will usually have no story behind it, and be booked on the fly a few weeks before the big day. The Road To WrestleMania isn€™t just uphill: it€™s also on rails.

Let€™s look at this year€™s card. The saga of Roman Reigns vs. The Authority has been going on since TLC last year, when truculent babyheel underdog Reigns snapped after failing to regain the WWE World Heavyweight from Sheamus and clobbered innocent babyheel boss Triple H*.

However, the main event match between Reigns and The Game wasn€™t made until Fastlane on February 21st.

Similarly, Shane McMahon didn€™t return until the night after Fastlane to set up the Hell In A Cell match with the Undertaker, and Brock Lesnar didn€™t assault Dean Ambrose (causing the Lunatic Haircut to challenge him to a WrestleMania match) until that same evening.

That€™s all three of the big matches on the card, set up six weeks before the show. The triple threat for the Diva€™s Championship was set up at the beginning of March, but every other match on the card was set up two to three weeks beforehand. I tell a lie: the ten-woman tag match didn€™t exist until last Monday.

It€™s yet more evidence that it€™s the WrestleMania brand that sells tickets here. WWE recognise that they€™ll get the gate and the WWE Network viewers they want regardless of who€™s on the show, and don€™t have to bother building a narrative.

Right? Because the alternative is that the WWE are now completely useless at booking the biggest success they€™ve ever had.

*No, the alignments are in no way confusing in this storyline.

Contributor
Contributor

Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.