10 Worst Things That Can Happen When You Lose A Wrestling Match

2. You Could Get Lynched By A Giant, Sulky Goth

For years, the worst thing the Undertaker would do to his fallen foes would be to zip them into a body bag. Fortunately, no one ever seemed to suffer ill effects from this happening to them. It's almost as though being zipped into a bag doesn't actually hurt... At the beginning of 1999, the Undertaker returned from weeks of absence after losing a Buried Alive match the previous month €“ and he returned with a new attitude, and friends who shared it. Previously pretty much a loner (with the exception of occasional manager and kind-of-sort-of-stepfather Paul Bearer), he began drawing people to him to act as his followers. First the Acolytes, Bradshaw and Faarooq, then Dennis Knight became Mideon and Mabel became Viscera. Finally, with the acquisition of vampire stable The Brood, the Undertaker€™s Ministry Of Darkness was complete€ and it was coming for the WWF, and Vince McMahon€™s rival Corporation stable.
Wrestlemania XV saw the initial skirmishes finally become the first shots of a war, as Undertaker faced the Corporation€™s head of security, The Big Boss Man in a ten minute match in Hell In A Cell. It wasn€™t much of a match €“ it was heel versus heel, no one was completely sure what to make of the Undertaker€™s new character yet, and although both men bled, the Boss Man was clearly massively outclassed €“ but the ending was pretty memorable. The three members of the Brood descended from the roof of the arena with a rope and noose, which they passed down to the Undertaker through the roof of the Cell €“ and as the Phenom fitted the noose around the Boss Man€™s neck, the Cell began to rise back to the ceiling again, taking the rope, the noose and the frantically flailing Boss Man with it. After a few seconds of kicking, the Boss Man hung motionlessly from the hangman€™s noose, four feet from the canvas, as the imposing figure of the Undertaker stood next to him and Michael Cole wittered on about it being symbolic. Well, of course it bloody was. It was also unprecedented: the Undertaker had just kayfabe lynched his opponent at the biggest show of the year, in front of the WWF€™s biggest audience of the year. Poor old Ray €˜Boss Man€™ Traylor not only had to do the job, but be executed afterwards€ and it must have been running through his head what might happen if the harness under his clothes broke and the noose tightened for real€
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Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.