10 Wrestlers Who Were Secretly Promo GODS

Bret Hart: not just great on the mic in 1997...

Hawk promo
WWE

There is a tier of great, best-in-class tier promos past and present.

Ric Flair in his pomp felt like the most hyperactively arrogant, compelling man alive. CM Punk was so steadfast in his unwavering conviction that he could tell you the earth was flat, or even make the case that Tyrus is a great wrestler, and you'd start to sway towards his viewpoint. Eddie Kingston makes it feel that the story he's telling consumes his entire soul.

The Rock could make fans sit in their own stale piss for a full 24 hours and they'd still be entranced by even vaguely amusing bullsh*t. Steve Austin was so incredible that he is the only person alive who can get away with a "What?" chant. Most western fans can't make head nor tail of what Atsushi Onita is saying, but they'd happily sit and listen to his zealous missives regardless.

Bobby Heenan was one of the funniest human beings ever; he just happened, and thank Christ, to pick wrestling as a vocation and not stand-up. Cody Rhodes could sell AEW to a bad faith podcaster and then enchant the WWE fandom within weeks.

Underneath, where you might not expect it...

10. Road Warrior Hawk

Hawk promo
WWE.com

Known primarily for his distinctly badass look, unbeatable ring music and recklessly awesome squash match game, Road Warrior Hawk was an iconic performer in his early years. Few held such influence over the industry; beyond the veritable horde of post-apocalyptic tag team imitators, Hawk's f*ck-you no-sell informs the DNA of epic pro wrestling matches to this day.

His "Oh, what a rush!" sign-off is also enshrined into legend, but his promo style in general was tremendous.

Hawk growled and popped the forehead vein, and was as imposing as anybody at that screaming, hyper-masculine style, but he wasn't one-dimensional. He knew his way around a deadpan delivery. Well past his prime, he once flatly noted to X-Pac, following a request to talk to his penis, that he "can't see it".

In his prime, he also had a poetic ability to describe a threat. He didn't just say he was going to kick your ass; he described the process with a deadly conviction and graphic detail.

"There's all kinds of jobs for everybody. Some people are into snow removal. Some are into garbage removal. Some are even into wart removal. Well me and Animal, we formed a new company. We're into head removal!"

When you remember what "promo" is short for, Hawk bordered on masterful: he set the scene for a bloodlust-fuelled ass-kicking in the middle of the ring.

 
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Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!