10 WWE Ideas EVEN Vince McMahon Thought Were Too Sleazy
Beaver silicone cleavage.
Vince McMahon is such a grotesque figure that you can never be too sure that any of this isn't a simulation, that you aren't a mere bystander in his story cruelly granted consciousness through the laws of the multiverse.
He is, simply, too broad and on-the-nose an antagonist in a satirical takedown of modern America.
Vince McMahon helpfully offered to become the onscreen father of his daughter's real, biological child when he wondered aloud how to properly monetise her. When Stephanie declined, he understood. Of course. I'm too old, that would be disgusting.
What about your brother Shane?
Blasphemy; simulated mock necrophilia; implied rape; terrorist attacks committed with piano wire; widow-pesterin'; simulated murder by hanging: angles in which women are dehumanised to the status of canines; angles in which cunnilingus is forced upon women; angles in which Olympic heroes express their desire to engage in "beastiality sex" with the black wives of their fellow athletes: all have made air.
There are however some ideas that Vince balked at, or otherwise couldn't bring himself to promote for longer than a week - and think of the ground, littered with piles of such good sh*t, that that covers...
10. Beaver Loves Cleavage
Vince McMahon had two 'white whales' he was beyond driven to pursue throughout his career as a wrestling promoter. One was to pack 100,000 punters into a football stadium, which he managed with a bald-faced lie.
The other was to script two blood relatives to f*ck each other on television.
In 1999, a series of rancid vignettes aired hyping the arrival of 'Beaver Cleavage'. A riff on Leave It To Beaver's preadolescent protagonist, where the Beaver of the 1960s staple got into various scrapes, discovering in the end that good behaviour is rewarded, the WWF's Beaver was named after a fanny and wanted to suck his mother's t*ts. This was the full scope of a gimmick that worked just the one televised match against Christian: he used his mischievous disposition to get his mother to touch him.
And if you're wondering why a man in arrested development with such a grotesquely close bond with his mother would choose the life of a travelling combat athlete, fear not: Mrs. Cleavage accompanied Beaver to the ring, allowing the WWF to promote another buxom blonde on TV.
This was too disgusting even for the most overtly 'Vince Russo' period of the WWF, and was swiftly abandoned.