5 Most Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Right Now (April 6)
3. Prize Pig
It's almost blackly hilarious, the sheer extent to which WWE could not care less about the André The Giant Memorial Battle Royal. WWE's selection process is thus: identify the members of the roster they think the least of, pack them onto the pre-show, determine which if any is mates with a celebrity, and just have them win it, why not.
This attitude has now been manifested in the form of the trophy itself, which looks less like a prize and more like the toy version of it, which is ironic. About as many people want to buy it as win it. Looking like mustard without cutting it, André's singlet is barely distinguishable. Sculptors tend to flatter their subjects, but since whomever was charged with the task presumably worked off the '90s Hasbro action figure, there is no euphemistic definition nor realistic flab. It is simply an enlarged action figure spray painted gold. It looks like sh*t, and some poor b*stard working a brutal schedule does so just to sniff it.
It's the worst-looking thing covered in gold since Dustin Rhodes lost all motivation in 1999.