6 Most Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Right Now (Dec 15)

For Christ's sake.

Jinder Mahal Triple H
Twitter/@WWE

Jinder. Mahal.

Those two words have become as tedious as the man himself - even more so in a Year-End List City populated entirely by mass disbelief at his very being.

Jinder. B*stard. Mahal.

His push both deadened the enthusiasm of fans in WWE's established territories, and alienated the actual demographic it was intended for. Fans in India were equally bemused - and they received the Great Khali as if he was bloody AJ Styles. Even if they were on board - they weren't, WWE had to reduce its December tour of India accordingly - there was no actual way of monetising his would-be popularity. WWE pay-per-views are broadcast on free television in locked-down deals, streaming services aren't as culturally entrenched as they are in the west, and broadband speeds, largely, are prohibitively low.

The terrifying implication of all which is, if Vince McMahon went Full Roman as opposed to Full Finn, Jinder might have held onto the belt longer than CM Punk did. Thank Christ Vince woke up on the side of the bed he did that morning, the mental awld b*stard.

The "hot take" concerning failed Vince McMahon experiments is that, when they do fail, they'll transition into a midcard comedy jobber role, often with added dancing.

Mahal's fate was far funnier than that...

6. HHH: Job For Me, Jinder

Jinder Mahal Triple H
WWE

For Christ's sake.

How do you approach something like this without descending into full neckbeard parody?

It's impossible. WWE is hardly going to peak at a Triple H pinfall win over Jinder Mahal in his ancestral homeland - but it's peak WWE, regardless. What's happened here is that, after months and months of cheap, dismal, contrived TV, the net result is a Triple H ego trip, even though the man usually only sparingly wrestles on RAW. Every performer on WWE TV is somehow subservient to the McMahon family. WWE took this cynical non-insight and formalised it by having Jinder bow at his crotch. Suck that, you godd*mn failure.

The message is clear: you're not allowed to fail on your own terms - and if you fail on our terms, you're still knackered. It's no loss - Jinder Mahal was hardly going to become more of a failure - but somehow, they made it so. It's harder to tell what would whiff more of bullsh*t - an AJ Styles retention at Sunday's Clash of Champions, all but telegraphed because Triple H is Triple H - or an out-of-the-blue Jinder win, rendered senseless because Triple H is Triple H.

"When his push fails, WWE will job Jinder out to Triple H in India."

Imagine writing that the day after SummerSlam, and not appearing like an absolute virgin.

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and surefire Undisputed WWE Universal Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!