You dont have to be the famously grouchy CM Punk to understand how people constantly asking for autographs can be a problem. If youre even slightly well known, it must prove a slight hardship when trying to get about in public and do normal things. Wrestling fans, though, take it to a different level. No doubt because theyre encouraged to cheer for you or boo you on a weekly basis, live and on television, and scream all kinds of things that they wouldnt dream of saying to a normal person: wrestling fans can take it all far, far too far. If you're a wrestler and you're on TV, you know what I'm talking about: it's the guys that interrupt meals and family occasions and who become aggressive and violent when you ask for privacy; the people that physically grab you when youre walking down the street, standing on a subway platform or waiting in line somewhere, ripping your headphones off or slapping the newpaper out of your hand. Punk has had his address splashed all over the internet, leading to fans camping out behind his house to buttonhole him when he takes out the trash. Dont think thats particularly worrying? Ask John Lennons kids how they feel about that. And then theres the people that take the opportunity to molest wrestlers when theyre in a public toilet like a rest room at a bar or airport. Sometimes thats while theyre washing their hands, thankfully but its still a little beyond whats normal. But photographs of you peeing at a toilet stall? Asking people questions while theyre in a stall? Several wrestlers have bonded with each other, resignation in their voices, over having autograph books slid underneath the stall door. Theres such a thing as personal space, people. Also, urrrgh. Finally, theres the guy who used a red light and a fake police siren to pull over Batista on the interstate and impersonate an undercover police officer in order to initiate a conversation with him. The Animal twigged that the eighteen-year-old wasnt a real cop and left the scene, calling 911. The kid was arrested, and his father complained that all hed wanted was an autograph and a picture. Sure and committing a misdemeanour with a prison sentence attached to it is absolutely the way to go about doing that.
Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.
