That Time Triple H Got His Hand Caught In The Cookie Jar

Triple H in the year 2000 was the best pro wrestler on the planet—but that wasn’t enough. He entered pro wrestling to become the greatest, and he was driven towards it fuelled by an at-times pathetic hubris.

That’s not to state that Triple H was never the same, or is nowhere near the conversation. His matches with the Undertaker at WrestleManias XXVII and XXVIII were awesome in drama, spectacle, content and heft. He went full Foley in his pursuit of making Batista a megastar. He cajoled Shawn Michaels back into the company’s bosom in 2002, and entered a seminal performance in an unsanctioned SummerSlam war that acted as the platform for WWE’s best output of that decade.

And yet, in the years that followed, he couldn’t help himself. The Game could not put down the controller. He told various—several—midcard acts to suck it, either by taking the piss out of their physique or kicking them square in the balls. When he jobbed to certain acts—like Jeff Hardy—he did so with a literal shrug, as if the Charismatic Enigma was a mere dog enjoying his day.

He told video game production company THQ that under no circumstances could he be shown in a position of weakness in the promotional material. Appearing weak, even in a simulation of a simulation, was an unrealistic—unbearable—prospect.

When Triple H got his hand caught in the cookie jar, he couldn’t bear the embarrassment. He never could take a joke at his expense, and it’s ironic: he invited further, career-long mockery because of it.