The Last Days Of The WWF

The May 6th 2002 edition of Raw kicked off not with the "Across The Nation" opening credits from the era that everybody inexplicably adores, but with a fairly obnoxious vignette of a woman clipping "WWF" into her hedge, before pouring gasoline on the F and setting it alight as if it stood for "Fiend" or something.

What had initially scanned as unthinkable was actually happening.

"World Wrestling Entertainment is on the air", wailed Jim Ross as the show kicked off, further confirming the shocking new reality. Trish Stratus and Jazz opened the show, but a lightning quick Women's Title match existed for another purpose. Jazz had been accompanied by Steven Richards, who had defeated Bubba Ray Dudley for the Hardcore Title one week earlier. It was about to change hands again thanks to the 24/7 rule right now, in fact. "And new WWE Hardcore Champion, Bubba Ray Dudley!" exclaimed Lillian Garcia. The crowd, as they sill did back then, went wild.

But this hot start wasn't what it first appeared to be. WWE, never bastions of subtlety, were about to kick off several months of absurdly on-the-nose marketing thanks to an ugly courtroom loss. The legally enforced changes to follow were beginning in earnest, and the company's typical method of forcing them into your eyes and ears and brain, Clockwork Orange-style, was underway.

Don't like it? Tough sh*t dweeb, get the F out...

CONT'D...