WrestleMania 33: 13 Early Match Predictions

5. Andre The Giant Battle Royal

andre the giant
WWE.com

Ah, the Andre the Giant Battle Royal. Much like the winner of The Royal Rumble, the battle royal has done wonders for whoever has won it. Just think of Cesaro...wait, that€™s a bad example. How about The Big Show? Umhey, Baron Corbin maybe might get something out of it!

Anyway, this is the match where everyone who doesn€™t have a feud finds themselves on the card. It€™s a way to reward the full-time roster by letting them appear at Mania, and give them a little payday. It€™s also a place to put everyone on the show who creative couldn€™t think of a storyline for. Let€™s take a look at the 20 likely participants:

Titus O€™Neil. Unless he grabs Vince McMahon€™s arm again.

Kane. Because Kane will never retire, and WWE will never find anything interesting for him to do again.

Ryback. His newest heel turn is off to a bad start, so this seems like a likely place to land next year.

Alberto Del Rio. The League of Nations has killed any momentum he€™s had since his return.

Rusev. See above.

Bubba Ray Dudley. He won€™t get the tables, but he€™ll get about four minutes in the ring before being tossed out.

D-Von Dudley. See above.

Aiden English. Does anyone really see McMahon pushing these guys for an entire year?

Simon Gotch. Yep. See above.

Curtis Axel. The Social Outcasts will be dead by this time, but Axelmania will remain a running gag for the next 10 years.

Tyson Kidd. WWE may put Kidd and Cesaro back together, or they may treat Kidd as an afterthought, which they usually do.

Kalisto. Management doesn€™t seem fully invested in him for some reason, meaning another singles match next year is highly unlikely.

Stardust. Yeah, sadly this is as good as it gets for him from here on out.

Bo Dallas. You just gotta €œbolieve€ he won€™t be cut from the roster within a year.

Surprise Returns:

The Boogeyman. We haven€™t seen Boogey since Royal Rumble 2015, which means we€™re due for another cameo!

Disco Inferno. Now that Sting has been in WWE, this is the biggest WCW name to never have shown up!

Ken Shamrock. Eh, why not?

Road Dogg. He€™s already around the backstage area at every show, and could still fall over a top rope in a pinch.

Jeff Jarrett. It€™s time to bury the hatchet and let Double J enjoy 15 seconds of fame!

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As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at." Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week. Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com