WWE: The 10 Craziest Jim Ross Reactions To Amazing Spectacles

8. Kurt's Got Milk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBLkIWeqFKI The setting for this one is Monday Night Raw on August 20, 2001. It was the night after SummerSlam, where Steve Austin retained his WWF Championship against Kurt Angle. Austin had the entire Alliance assembled in the ring with him to celebrate. He gave a hilariously non-Stone-Cold speech about how touched he was by their support. He praises them for being like a family to him, while the rag-tag group smiles big ridiculous smiles and slaps each other on the back for being so cool. It's particularly entertaining to see Stephanie McMahon overacting and pandering to Austin here, and makes the next scene even sweeter. While Austin starts in on Taz for being the only one not wearing a Stone Cold shirt, he is interrupted by Kurt Angle's music. Angle wastes no time making his big entrance, driving an old-fashioned milk truck. He bursts out from the driver's seat, and starts hurling cartons of milk at The Alliance in the ring. "Here comes Stasiak..." who naturally runs into the hood of the truck and knocks himself out. "What an idiot!" says Ross. Sometimes, the simplest words are the best ones. Kurt pours a carton of milk on Stasiak for his troubles, then sets his sights on the quivering gang of goofs that was once celebrating in the ring. From the truck, he reveals a giant hose, and aims it at The Alliance. "Milkamania is running wild!" proclaims Ross, as everyone in the ring is flailing about, getting sprayed by the milk. Hats off to everyone for making that milk bath look so devastating. Only Jim Ross could lend such gravity to this occasion: "It's Milkman Madness by God! The Million-Dollar Princess Has Become... A DAIRY QUEEN!" That line was so funny, I don't care if it was scripted ahead of time because Jim Ross delivered it to perfection. For his part, Angle is treating this like the gold-medal round of the Olympics, so serious is he as he gets down to the business of humiliating his adversaries. "Kurt Angle's up on top of the milk wagon, and he's pulling out the heavy stuff! It's homogenized!" Not only are these one-liners priceless, but this segment is made all the better by Kurt Angle's ridiculous level of commitment to it, and Stone Cold's expression as they fade to black.
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