Anyone who has ever tried to make a serious amount of money on football will attest to the fact that trying to predict what will happen around the Beautiful Game is a fool's gambit and a quick way to part yourself from all of your money. Unpredictability is part of the game's charm, but then that doesn't necessarily mean that you can't have some bankers on your card. It is inevitable that Sunderland will defy the most miserable expectations, despite having a cumulative defensive age of 234, just as it is inevitable that David Craig will be shown on Sky Sports News on Transfer Deadline Day pretending that the news that nobody is signing for Newcastle is actually news to him. And because of the broken hearts and cemented expectations that Newcastle fans have had to suffer over the past few years, it's possible to pin-point some of the biggest things that will happen at the club in the next year. So put away your crystal balls - the biggest events of this season have already been mapped out. Each and every one is as inevitable as someone on Goals On Sunday asking why Newcastle fans expect to win so much...
10. A New Striker In January
Anyone thinking Yohan Cabaye will return to Tyneside like a returning hero welcomed back to the bosom of his spiritual home should remember that Newcastle was never anything but a stepping stone for Yohan Cabaye. And the club would have no concerns admitting that's exactly how it was sold to him. So wipe that dreamy smile off your face at the news he will be available, and prepare to see him in Arsenal's strip (though not without some furious rumour peddling). What might surprise fans - particularly those whose response to all transfer speculation is "that F*t c*ckney b*stard won't ever put his hand in his pocket, you tragic fools!" - is that a striker will probably be brought in in winter. After all, it's a necessity: Papiss Cisse is off to the ACN (probably), Facunda Ferreyra is currently second choice for the reserves, and relying on the others will put too much strain on them. So expect a "proven" goalscorer to come in - in the vein of Gignac, but maybe not him (he'll cost a pretty penny even with his contract out).
