Doctor Who: 10 Irritating Nu-Who Trends That Need To Die

These things act against everything that we believe in. They must be fought. Or at least criticized sternly.

Doctor Who is, obviously, the best thing ever. Let's be clear about that. There's no intention here to suggest otherwise. Furthermore, anyone who was a fan of the show in 1989 will know only too well a certain reluctance to criticize anything about the show for fear that they'll stop making it again. (The exception to this rule being those who are actively hoping that they'll stop making it again because it's not exactly the same as it used to be, but you're better off just ignoring those people.) All that established, it remains true that there are certain corners of Nu-Who that have bred the most terrible things. Things that act against everything that we believe in. They must be fought. Or at least criticized sternly.

10. It's A Crisis, Not A Request For Your CV

Most viewers can repeat the line by heart by this point. 'I'm the Doctor. I'm a Time Lord from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasterborous. I'm over 900 years old and I am going to .' To which the rational mind would respond, 'Our ship is crashing into the sun right now, I don't give a crap about your age or home address.' It's an irritating line because it can't possibly mean anything to anyone else in the scene beyond making The Doctor look kind of pretentious. The vast majority of people to whom this line is spoken these days could not possibly have ever heard of Time Lords, Gallifrey or Kasterborous. (It's also worth mentioning that a constellation is really only relevant to whatever specific place in the Universe from which that constellation can be seen. 'Constellation' being a reference to how stars appear to be grouped from a specific vantage point and not an empirical measurement, which makes the statement doubly pointless to every other place in the universe.) It's a statement that exists entirely to please the fans watching at home and which adds absolutely nothing to the story at hand. Knock it off.
Contributor
Contributor

Mikey is, in no particular order, a freelance writer, improvisational comedian, volunteer firefighter, playwright, Bon Vivant, and Jane Espenson enthusiast. Born in the small mining town of Eden Prairie, MN, he has some 40 years later successfully moved about 20 miles north of there to the City of Brooklyn Center, MN where he lives with an unreasonable number of dogs. If you'd like to hear him discuss something other than Doctor Who while pretending to be a dog, check out www.the42ndvizsla.blogspot.com or follow him on twitter at @the42ndVizlsa