We've gone through a lot of strange, sad and silly stories throughout this odyssey of missing actors, but perhaps the strangest, saddest and silliest is that of Thora Birch. Like Mena Suvari, her co-star in American Beauty, there was a period where Thora Birch was in every hip, successful film going, most notably her starring role in the cult classic Ghost World. She was also in that big-budget Dungeons and Dragons film, which probably seemed a good idea at the time. Maybe if she'd got a better roll on initiative... Anyway, after that brief period where she was one of the hottest young actors working she, well, stopped working. Or at least, stopped working in films of the quality and popularity of her breakout turns. So whatever happened to Thora Birch's career? Her weird dad, that's what. There's a reason we've not seen much of Thora as of late - her last film was in 2012, and I can say with some certainty you didn't see it - and that's because her dad is her manager. And her dad is insane. Besides doing creepy stuff like practically directing his daughter's sex scene in 2009's Winter of Frozen Dreams, the elder Birch - who was a porn actor in his heyday, and "acted" with his wife in not-a-Watergate-film Deep Throat - has lost his daughter/only client pretty much every stage and screen part she's been up for in the past five years by threatening anyone who goes near her, any director whose staging he disapproves of, and generally being a nutcase. Unfortunately for Birch, whilst firing your manager can be a tricky business, firing your dad is even harder. So I wouldn't hold your breath for a return by Enid Coleslaw any time soon, unless her dad comes up against a producer that's equally insane. And I really, really hope there isn't any such producer.
Tom Baker is the Comics Editor at WhatCulture! He's heard all the Doctor Who jokes, but not many about Randall and Hopkirk. He also blogs at http://communibearsilostate.wordpress.com/
