10 Films That Took Themselves Way Too Seriously

Crimson Peak yearns to be classic Guillermo Del Toro, but it lacks the wit and invention necessary to pull it off. If there really are two Del Toros – the Oscar caliber filmmaker who made Pan’s Labyrinth and the evil twin who directed Pacific Rim – then Crimson Peak is the work of the evil twin.

It’s a period gothic that’s aiming for profundity, but for all its symbolism and self-importance, the movie is all surface and no substance. Jessica Chastain, Tom Hiddleston and Mia Wasikowska try so hard to breathe life into the material but despite their efforts, the characters still sound like the invention of a pretentious screenwriter.

“The things we do for love like this are ugly, mad, full of sweat and regret,” Chastain says at one point. “This love burns you and maims you and twists you inside out.”

And so it goes for two hours, with the plot unfolding pretty much as you’d expect.