3. Midnight Express (1978)
Ah, Turkey. The climate. The food. The history. The chocolate bars made of jelly in purple wrappers. What's not to love? Well, pop Midnight Express on and you'll likely never leave the house, let alone visit said country. Plus you'll feel physically sick trying to carry as much as a pack of Rennies through customs. Based on a true-life account of life in a Turkish prison, Midnight Express shows the consequences of drugs. On one hand it's all giggling and traipsing down to the 24 hour garage to buy an Aero, but the flipside - a miserable squalid life of torture, sexual assault, mental decline and near-death, really is possibly the most powerful 'Thinking of smuggling drugs? Don't be silly, you twonk' public information film ever produced. It's a bit like Porridge. Only with all the funny characters taken outside, beaten to death, shot for good measure, and then replaced with toothless knife-wielding pyschopaths covered in excrement. Not really like Porridge to be honest, I was just trying to lighten the mood. Plus, if you're looking to escape, you'll have to put up with the years of despair of misery, before you take your chance when your warden is about to make a move on you and impale his head on a coat hook. Just say no, eh? And then have two weeks in Scarborough instead.