By Japanese standards, RoboGeisha is reasonably restrained in the first 10 minutes, only a handful of people are killed. True, theyre killed by shuriken fired from a girls butt, but for the country that gave us Horny House Of Horror (2010) and Rape Zombie: Lust Of The Dead (2012), death by butt shuriken seems almost respectable. Anyway, the film tells the story of Yoshie (Aya Kiguchi), a downtrodden teenager inducted into a mysterious company that trains geisha girls to be assassins. After genetic modification, the girls can shoot bullets from their breasts, release samurai blades from their armpits or unleash their most powerful weapon, a flesh-eating substance known as breast milk from hell. When Yoshie goes rogue, it leads to everything you want to see in a movie called RoboGeisha lots of fight sequences involving scantily-clad women. However, special mention must be made of the climactic duel, where each opponent employs her butt sword. Its moments like this that define Japanese cinema in the 21st century.
Ian Watson is the author of 'Midnight Movie Madness', a 600+ page guide to "bad" movies from 'Reefer Madness' to 'Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead.'
