10 Horror Remakes So Bad They Never Got A Sequel

Speaking of tawdry rip-offs, here’s a new ‘vision’ of Joseph Ruben’s 1987 movie, updated to the era of cell phones and America’s Most Wanted by JS Cardone and Nelson McCormick, the ‘creative’ duo that also remade Prom Night. If you’re not familiar with Ruben’s version, it had Terry O’Quinn (Lost) in a career-making turn as Gerry Blake, who roamed the country marrying widows before erupting into violence every time his ‘perfect’ new family failed to live up to his harsh standards.

Blake becomes David Harris (Dylan Walsh) in this remake, and like every other adult in the film, he’s a one-dimensional clown. Pure evil and so indestructible he must be made from liquid metal, David has two facial expressions: a fake smile that somehow fools everybody, and a sour snarl that means Duck And Cover.

When we reach the final confrontation – which takes place on a rooftop, during a thunderstorm, while Hitchcock knock-off music plays – it’s a reminder of how low-key the original was. Gerry Blake was stabbed and shot and died. He didn’t get up and walk away after being stabbed in the neck, thrown through a wall, tossed off a roof and sent crashing through a greenhouse. He died.

Until they resurrected him for the next one, anyway.